Contrary to popular belief, I am NOT the mysterious toe-licking bandit running amok around the Art Museum, but thanks for thinking of me all the same! While I will admit that I like to employ a wide variety of shameful fetishes in my arsenal of sexual perversion, feet just don't do it for me.
Perhaps it's because I'm homeless and I usually only hook up with other homeless women, who don't have feet so much as pincushions for the purposes of jabbing hypodermic needles - as if there's a need to keep up pretenses anymore. It's not like you have any job interviews coming up in the not too distant future. Yes I'm talking to you, Bertha, you unfaithful slut!
I apologize for that outburst, readers. Back to the subject at hand...
Occasionally I am blessed with the opportunity to open mouth kiss girls who confuse my odor and shoddy wardrobe as "punk rock chic" before I get the chance to beg them for money as they stumble out of the bars at 2am. But they don't ever seem to be into the toe stuff. Most of the time I usually just end up peeing on them.
